I’m not very good at being still.
Sometimes I get tired and worn out, but all it takes is one day of rest and I’m usually bored by the end of it.
Some people are just designed to never stop moving, and I guess I’m one of them.
So you can imagine my disappointment this past month as I’ve spent it sidelined with an annoying foot injury.
Resting is really, really challenging for me – especially when it feels like I’m getting nothing done.
It feels like I’ll never get better.
It feels like I’m wasting a lot of time and energy.
It feels like I’m going to lose a lot of my strength and progress while I rest.
It feels like I can’t even live my normal life. While I can get around the house just fine, running to the library or walking to church or a friend’s house will leave me in pretty bad pain afterward.
It feels like one step forward and two steps back.
I’m not trying to be dramatic here. I’m just trying to be real.
I’m a doer. I’m a go-getter.
It’s amazing how quickly I can slip into despair when my body isn’t performing up to my mind’s expectations.
I have a hard time holding myself back – which is probably how I got injured in the first place. I ignored the pain for several months before actually accepting that I was hurt.
Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.
I’m being forced to remember that HE is what gives me life.
Not this body.
In fact, if I’m being brutally honest, sometimes I look to activities to give me life instead of him.
Sometimes I worship by body and its capabilities more than the actual creator who gave me those capabilities.
My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall; but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.
And I’m reminded to be grateful in all things, because this little thing is so small compared to the suffering of others.
I can think of many who have it worse right now, and I’m incredibly humbled by that.
This isn’t to make me or anyone else feel guilty when they are struggling.
It’s just a reminder to practice gratitude daily.
A reminder that all struggles can be part of the refining process and ultimately help us cling to Jesus in our need.
Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.
Return to your rest, my soul, for the Lord has been good to you.
I’m speaking these words to my soul right now, even though I don’t feel like it.
It’s about more than how I feel.
It’s about seeing past the skewed reality that I’m currently believing.
It’s about not growing faint.
It’s about trusting that the actual truth is better than the lie in front of me.
It will take more than a minor inconvenience like this to bring me down.
Because I have hope that doesn’t disappoint.
I have strength that comes from something greater than myself.
I trust that this is about a lot more than just my foot, and that I’m learning and growing through this whole process.
I trust that my cares and burdens -big and small- belong to him, and he will bring about full restoration.
The Lord fill fight for you; you need only to be still.
Ask yourself, who am I aside from what I do? Is it enough to just be?
This week, dare to “waste” time with someone you care about.